“We’re our own worst enemy. You doubt yourself more than anybody else ever will. If you can get past that, you can be successful.” Michael Strahan
We have all had times when we didn’t believe in ourselves or lacked confidence, but when self-doubt becomes chronic it can prevent us from being our best selves. Self-criticism can be useful, it helps to keep us in check, and not to overdo things, but self-doubt, negative self-talk, and critique can make us shy away from accomplishment and move on to easier things or just stop altogether.
Self-doubt can begin in our early lives, such as from our parents, who undoubtedly wanted us to stay safe and protected, or from our own previous experiences. These could be events or episodes which triggered anxiety, or where we failed at something, or maybe we are just holding back due to fear of failure or even success. Self-doubt can cause further problems and prevent us from moving toward our goals. In time this can lead to anxiety, depression, and sleep disorders.
Self-doubt can emerge in several ways:
1. Indecision: where choices aren’t clear or aren’t able to be acted upon. If you are someone who is unable to make big or even small decisions, you can end up feeling stuck and this can cause you to overthink, procrastinate or not act at all.
2. Self-sabotage: this can prevent us from achieving our goals, or avoid success. Self-sabotage can be conscious, or unconscious and in turn can affect our personal goals, professional status, and accomplishments.
3. Imposter syndrome: this is where a person feels like a fraud, despite having experience, education, and accomplishments.
4. Mental health issues: anxiety, depression, insomnia and muscle tension, and many other disorders, or self-doubt accompanying existing poor mental health.
Here are 7 powerful ways to overcome self-doubt
i) Tell the inner critic inside your head to STOP, literally shout ‘STOP’ inside your head. Make a conscious effort to notice when, and what, negative self-talk is taking place and change it. Know that your inner critic is only there to keep you safe, but it isn’t always right or necessary. Shouting internally can short-circuit the inner critic and silence the noise in your head so you can think with more clarity.
ii) Make a list of all the positive things you have done, and all the times you overcame obstacles. Focus only on your achievements no matter how big or small.
iii) Don’t be afraid of others and their opinions. Most people have doubts about themselves and what is good or bad but it doesn’t mean that their view should be the same as yours. Any opinion they offer will only ever be from their perspective.
iv) Use mindfulness techniques to get some perspective on your negative thinking. Rethink all the positive things that are in your life and how you accomplished them.
v) Listen to a good e-book or podcast about boosting self-esteem, positive thinking, and optimism like ‘Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life’ by Martin Seligman.
vi) Use your breath to focus your attention on the good things in your life. If you have a setback or start listening to that inner critic again, accept it for what it is, a lapse of attention. Practice makes perfect and sometimes everyone encounters a setback, yes even very successful people, in fact, they often view failures as learning experiences. Just breathe and bring yourself back to positive practices.
vii) Celebrate small successes as these will boost your confidence. Rome wasn’t built in a day and often our own expectations don’t match what is realistic.
Here at Artemiz I can help you to eliminate self-doubt by using simple coaching techniques and strategies to turn that inner self-doubt around into glowing confidence and achievement.
Contact me today on artemizcoaching.com
